10 Things I Do Differently #2
Midsummer, microneedling, and the orchestra concert I almost missed because I don't read school emails.
Sometimes I exhibit some random mom behavior that I can’t even explain to myself.
Where are these instincts and reactions coming from?
Then I came across a Finnish comedy account on Instagram, where the Finnish male comedian acted out everyday scenes, pretending to be a Finnish mom. I laughed out loud so hard. How was he sounding exactly like me? How is it possible I have said some of those things verbatim to my family, even though I started a family in the US, not in the Nordics? Some habits must just be in the genes.
This must also explain my inexplicable urge to get everything in my life and in my house in order before Midsummer. It’s a powerful turning point, launched by a celebration more sacred and important than any other.
That’s why it’s so critical to prepare for it as if your life depended on it—because in a way, it does. Not having unfinished business actually frees you up to have a summer of your (Nordic) dreams… meaning you can prioritize rest, relaxation, and recharging over anything else.
It’s really wild when you see what this looks like in real life. In the Nordics, midsummer officially kicks off the long summer vacation, and people literally just vanish afterward. Helsinki, the capital city, turns into a ghost town. Countless stores have signs on the door:
“See you in August! Enjoy your summer.”
No one will respond to anything, schedule anything, or organize anything. And all you can do, if you are there, is go along with it.
I have long dreamed of doing something similar here in the US. And, based on what I have heard from you, you are just as exhausted as I am and craving a day where no one needs anything from you and you can just lie on a floatie in a pool or lounge in a beach chair, and gaze at the clouds floating by.
To make this happen for you and for me, I’m working on a Moms’ Summer Survival Guide aka 100 Ways to Do Nothing for the Best Summer of Your Life Playbook! Subscribe now, if you haven’t already, so you don’t miss this:
Now, let’s dive into the ten things. Here's what getting my life in order before Midsummer actually looks like:
I’ll let you know about my vanity project first, as it’s become trendy again to tell others online how ‘you have done nothing to your face'— even if Botox is now the single most popular cosmetic procedure on the planet. Seeing this, I want to let you know with Finnish authenticity exactly what I have gotten done. Of course, in preparation for glowing summer skin.
This spring, I had a series of three microneedling appointments with IPL to reduce fine lines and brown spots at a dermatologist’s office. I also started using a prescription Estriol cream at night to rebuild collagen. Also, not sure if you noticed, but I’m keeping my bangs a teeny bit longer—bangs are the easiest non-toxic fix for any frown lines!
As for my makeup look for the summer, I don’t wear much—usually just a lip tint—when I’m not filming or going out for dinner. Instead, I have a regular appointment at a NYC salon for a lash lift, lash tint, and brow tint (sometimes with lamination). And, just like most Nordics, I love being tan (but will not fry my skin in the sun), so I get a spray tan on the regular for the summer months.
What lipstick I wear in every reel and picture continues to be one of my most frequently asked questions, so I need to let you know it’s sadly discontinued. But, I did test a bunch of new ones: you will love these very similar tints I got to replace my favorite lipstick of all time. For the step-by-step, and all the products I use, why and when, hop over here:
In my home, I have now decluttered every single corner and closet, except my boys’ school and art projects from this past spring semester. I highly recommend you do this now, if you haven’t yet. You absolutely do not want to have any piles of stuff or extra work that will take you away from recharging this summer. Below is a link to the Guide on how to easily get started:
I promise you that it will be a transformative thing to do! A beautiful, organized, low-maintenance home fuels good mental health, happiness, and creativity, both for you and the kids. If you don’t believe me, listen to Kiira, the Finnish master organizer, who just shared this on our recent Scandi Circle Live:
If you are enjoying this so far, don’t forget to tap the heart-shaped “like” button at the end, it’s like saying “Hi! I was here!”
I dropped the ball on a LOT OF things this May and June. Prepping for the summer break took so much bandwidth—along with my writing and filming—that I simply could not remember, well, so many other things. But instead of feeling guilty, I realized how good it was for my family. Nothing fell apart, and, to my surprise, my older boys rose to the occasion, proving that we do not need to remember or do it all. If it’s their thing, they can remember and remind others of it, too. It’s a family effort! I’ll give you an example below.
Both of my sons had a school orchestra concert. The first one I didn’t know about, because I hadn't read any school emails.
“Mama! I have an orchestra performance tonight! You are coming, right?”
“What? How did I not know? Ok. Of course. What time?”
Sorted.
I then got my other son’s performance on the calendar, but I forgot all about it. As I had not read any emails, I didn’t know the details. I just assumed it was exactly where it was the year before, and at the same time.
“Mama! We gotta go!”
“Now?!”
“Yes!”
“Ok. Ok. Let me change quickly.”
“Noooo… we’ll be late!”
“Well, you go first, I’ll come after.“
“No, just come.”
“Just one sec!…. ok let’s run!”
“Mama! Where are you going? You want to walk?”
“To your school? Yes, of course.”
“It’s not there.”
“No? Where is it?”
“At my brother’s school.”
“OMG. Omg. Get in the car, RUN!”
“…Look, no one is even inside yet! Perfect timing.”
Could it have been less chaotic? Of course. But I have given up on keeping up with every kid-related communication in the US. It’s too much. I do what I have bandwidth for, and my boys remember the most important things, and that’s enough.
The lesson here is that we can’t juggle too many balls. We have to intentionally drop many of them, and focus on what only we can do—and actually let everyone else do what they are capable of. There’s no way to prepare for Midsummer without doing this — or create balance for the rest of the year.
We don’t have a basic, in-the-middle-of-nowhere lake house, like many Finns, for silence and solitude, so I created a little silence and solitude spot for myself, a little garden paradise, on the balcony of my bedroom. This is where I retreat when I need a little breathing space. I hope you create a little nook for yourself too!
I have kept an eye out for our roses and hydrangeas—that have bloomed just in time for Midsummer—to make flower crowns. This is how you can do them, along with baking a very Finnish cream strawberry cake (love this recipe; it’s in English with US measurements)!
If you've made it this far, you're my kindred spirit. The next few things are ones I've written about before but always cut before publishing — they're more personal, a little messy, and the kind of thing I'd only tell a friend. We're talking the radical way I’m approaching graduations this week, an evening routine that actually works (for you too), and what I'm doing to set my son up for academic success next year (completely counterintuitive, I promise).
