20 Comments

I am solidly anti-goodie bag but can get behind a piñata with treat bags to fill in lieu

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Great idea: pinata! we did it once too and filled it with mini vegan candies and licorice -- which were part of the yummy things to eat, besides the cake.

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Can't help but to think that these super lavish parties are not for kids but for the adults, and are (however fun & awesome) unfortunately creating an unsustainable standard for the future..

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Hi Ann-Mari! I do think at some point many parents do or have to simplify the parties - as the kids get older, and don't invite the entire class which is typical, and just a few closer friends. I think I also warn the parents now in advance that it's "nordic style free play" so that the expectations are lower. And it also frees me from the expectations because the Nordic style expectations I meet! :-)

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And the life value you are gifting your boys by going simple, I can asure you, they will take with them, forever. As a Latina, you might have heard how extra our culture can be when it comes to dressing up and parties. But my mom raised us with simple yet intentional celebrations, and still to this day, that’s how I carry any type of celebration or hosting I do in my home. And I truly think it’s an invitation for real connection with others! ❤️

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Thanks Laurie! Of course, I'm worried if they feel like, oh, why don't I have this lavish party, but so far, they have preferred the free play parties at home when they can just run wild with their guy friends! II didn't actually even think about the bonding aspect that much, but it's true - because the party has no organized activities, they do get to connect and bond with each other in a whole different way than if their activities were guided - it's really like a "guys night out"! That was so beautifully said!

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What an interesting topic!

I prefer simple too, 100%.

Everyone knows that we as adults, do not need super lavish surroundings to have a good time - as long as our company is good! Often the best parties are very simple.. so why should the kids be any different.

However, my boy who turned five, LOVES to organize parties: he hosted a New York (his birthtown) themed bday for his class here in Helsinki. We did have little goodie bags (a few dollar items bought in a souvenir shop in NY) and my son made personalized holiday cards for each guest and put them in bags. Many parents commented how lovely that was. So in this case organizing the party was a fun thing to do together.

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Thanks Meri! This raises such a great and important point: party-planning CAN be stress-free and fun and great activity to do together -- especially if the parent and the child love it. And you also managed to do it without an astronomical cost. I happen to live with 4 guys (3 small, 1 big ;-) none of who are the party-planning types. Your way of hosting a party was also a really nice way to bring his other country and culture into the mix!

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On goodie bags: in Austria they are expected... What I often do is to let the children do some handicrafts for example: bracelet or bake cookies and take them home after. Sort of instead of goodie bags...

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Wow, Austria seems to be quite similar to the US -- goodie bags and parties outside of the home. Do you know why people choose to rent a place instead? To provide an experience or not to mess up the home:-) ? But this idea of having kids make some things for their friends is super sweet - especially if the kids love it and enjoy it!

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Similar in that sense yet, but in Austria they hardly do lavish parties. It's more down to earth than in the US, even if outside of home.

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I think it's just part of the culture... Especially in Vienna people rather party outside their homes. Even adults rather choose restaurants or wine yards...

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I make it as part of the activity, so they all do it for themselves...

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We also have just cake, frozen pizza and plain Ikea napkins at the kids birthday party at home with very little stress. However, if my children wish for it, then a themed treasure hunt can be easily done by yourself without any extra props. We do this here in Austria, where nobody holds children's birthdays at home, so a home party is exotic enough...

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Love the themed treasure hunt idea... Easy to do especially on the backyard. Might have to do that for one of our little ones parties!

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I really hate this goodiebag thing -which some of our friends have had at their kids b-days. We never had them. Only this fishing (onginta) once and kids arranged it themselves.

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I have mixed feelings about the goodie bags because I get how cute of an idea it is and especially if it's not just throw-away toys but something you can keep and really enjoy, the kids are excited to get a present too -- when we did the one lavish party in NYC, each goodie bag had the Little Prince book -- but of course it was very expensive to buy, I'm not sure how many it was, maybe 10-12 books. But, then on the other hand, maybe kids shouldn't expect to get a present because they are there to celebrate the birthday kid, and already hosted for cake and play and more fun?

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That’s the thing. My opinion is that only the birthday kid get’s presents…not everyone.

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yes to this! currently planning my son’s birthday party and questioning many expensive and wasteful parts of typical parties. for me, the goal is that the guests have an enjoyable time and that my child feels loved and special. that can be accomplished very simply and sustainably!

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Yes! It’s so ok to not do goodie bags. Especially when our houses are all overflowing with junk already and the goodie bags just add to the plastic mountain.

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